Malley, Dora Shapiro_1975/11/27, Oral History, 1975 - 1975

My name is Irma Malley Gross and I am about to introduce my mother, Dora Shapiro Malley. IM: Mother, would you like to tell us where you were born? DM: I was born in Hartford, Connecticut, June 7, 1893. We lived on Windsor Street at the time. IM: And were you the first in the family? DM: I was the second. IM: Do you remember anything about your childhood, what it was like? Did you live on Windsor Street for very long? DM: We lived on Windsor Street a short time and then my father bought a house on Pleasant Street. A beautiful section of Pleasant Street. And it was a two family house. We stayed there until there were, I had 5 brothers at the time, 1sister and from there were moved to larger quarters on Pleasant Street, on the hill which was a rather large house. IM: A single house? DM: It was a single house. It was originally a two family house but we took over most of the house in order to have enough room for the children. IM: Okay. I think, Mom, let’s go back and talk a little bit about your parents because that’s an interesting story. Where was your father born? DM: My father was born in Poland. IM: Do you know about when? DM: Well he came here when he was about 21 years old. That was in 1886. So that made him that minus 21, 1855. IM: So he came here at that time from Poland. Your mother came from where? DM: My mother came from Gottenberg, Sweden. But she was also born in Poland and at an early age they moved to Sweden. IM: So she lived in Sweden for most of her childhood? DM: Most of her childhood. And they went to Sweden because of grandpa’s father who was acquainted IM: You mean Mr. Malley DM: His father was acquainted, it was my grandfather IM: In other words, daddy’s father knew your father, your grandfather in Sweden both families came from Sweden is that what you’re saying? But they had originally come from Poland and migrated to Sweden. They came over to this country and settled in Hartford, Connecticut. Was there a reason why DM: My father originally landed in New York because he knew the Sedarsky family who ran a bath house and after that they moved to Hartford. They decided to come to Hartford and they told him all about Hartford so he came along too. IM: This is your father? Now your mother’s family came to Hartford because the Malleys had come to Hartford? DM: Because the Malleys had come IM: That’s very interesting. They didn’t know, did they, at that time that you were going to marry a Malley? DM: That’s right. IM: That’s really strange, isn’t it? Now we have your father, not his family, just your father came, is that right, he was the only one? But your mother’s family came to Hartford. All right. So we have two young peopl4e who came to Hartford. How did your mother and father meet? DM: My father went to this home on Pleasant Street, in fact it is the aunt of my friend Rose Kamins. Her place was a meeting place for young people and he used to go there because some of them came from the same town in Poland. And she also went there because all the people were going there. Young people were going so she went there. That’s where she met him. IM: So that’s where your mother and father met? I see. That’s very interesting. Now what did your father do when he came here? What kind of a job did he get? DM: When he first came to this country in 1886 he worked in a book binding place where they bound books because he had done that work in the old country. He knew how to do that. After working a short time he went into the painting and wallpapering and worked for a company in Hartford, J. L. White Company. After he worked for them a few years he decided to go in for himself and that was the year he got married, in 1890. IM: He started his own company? DM: He started his own business. IM: What was it called? DM: The American Wallpaper Company IM: American Wallpaper and Paint DM: American Wallpaper and Paint Company. He hired men to go out and do work. IM: He had men who did the work for him? DM: Yes. He had a little paint store. And after a few years he enlarged his store and it became quite a large place and they sold retail and wholesale and gradually gave up having men go out and do wallpapering. Because he had a lot of painters working for him and he didn’t want to compete with them. IM: I see. So he became strictly a retail and wholesale paint and paper store. And how long did that store exist? DM: That store existed well after he passed away it was carried on by my oldest brother Joe and Mo and then after Joe passed away Seymour, my youngest brother took it on and he gave it up. I forgot what year it was. IM: Not too many years ago. Perhaps 10 years ago. DM: He kept the name and he and his wife ran, it was a much smaller business at the time. IM: Yes, I understand. DM: It moved from downtown up to Whitney Street IM Were there many Jewish men if business at the time your father opened his business? DM: There were a few and they were mostly in real estate and we did work for them. We would send out men to do the work for them and otherwise they would themselves would buy the products. IM: What I would like to know about now is if you can remember much about what it was like growing up. You went to school in Hartford. What school did you go to? DM: I went to the Second Art School on High Street. We had a little walk. It wasn’t too far walking from Pleasant Street to High Street. IM: This was in elementary school? DM: Elementary school. and after elementary school I went to Hartford High School. IM: You went to Hartford High? DM: I went only 2-1/2 years because I had to leave at that time because my father took very sick. But I used to work even when I was in the seventh grade at the Graham School I would at noon I would hurry my lunch and run down to the store and keep track of the store so that it wouldn’t be robbed by those who came in. The painters had a way of taking things. I would wait until he went home to get his lunch. IM: So while your father went home for lunch DM: Then I would rush back to school at nearly 1:30 and I’d come in half out of breath and the teacher would always say what is the matter with you? You’re so late again. I said I had to run, I was out of breath. I did that even in high school. In high school we got out at 2 o’clock but I want to have him had his lunch earlier so I got an excuse from the doctor that I had last period free and I got an excuse to walk because he said I had headaches and I had to go out and stay out in the air. IM: Oh my. Well it was all for a good cause. We know that you worked very hard. You watched the store did you wait on people? DM: I waited on people and during the high school years I would go to work at 7 o’clock in the morning. And he would open up the store at 7 o’clock I would go with him and I would wait on the painters who’d come in for their supplies, answer the telephone and I would work there until quarter past 8 because I had to be in high school at 8:30. IM: Well you certainly did work hard. And I know that he appreciated it. I remember all the years. DM: I used to work until 7 o’clock in the evening. We didn’t close at 6 o’clock, you know, we had to stay until 7 because the painters decided to come to buy supplies after they got through working. So we had to stay until 7 o’clock many times and on Saturday night we worked until 10 o’clock at night. IM: Those were long hours. DM: Long hours. IM: Now you did other things besides work. Did you have some fun in those days? Do you remember what it was like being, let’s say being a young teenager, after you left high school? How old were you when you left high school? DM: Left high school , let’s see, when I was 17. IM: 17 DM: So you graduated at 15 and I was there for 2-1/2 years, 17-2/3. IM: All right. Now what happened then? Did you meet lots of young people? Did you ever go out? DM: We lived right near the Hebrew Institute which was a place, a meeting place for young people, there were classes, Hebrew classes there. There was also a large auditorium where the young people would gather for lectures or Zionists speakers would come and we would have entertainment and we would meet there. In fact, I belonged to a Zionist girls club where we used to meet every couple of weeks and we were interested in Zionism and we contributed 5 cents each time and after we had enough money we would send it to Palestine to a school for young people. IM: Now this Hebrew Institute, was this the same group as the Zionist group, or was the Zionist group part DM: The Zionist group use to meet in the Hebrew Institute. IM: The Hebrew Institute was a building? Where was it located? DM: Right there on Pleasant Street. Just very close to the home. IM: Was it sort of like a YWCA? DM: It was a very large home originally and it was turned into this, it was fixed up. They had a large auditorium and they had rooms downstairs. And the boys used to meet too, the Macabee boys, they were Zionists. They would meet there too. IM: The boys were the Macabbees and what were the girls called? DM: Ours was the Judith Zion Club. But there were younger girls groups, Zionists. They were called the Roses of Sharon or something like that. They had all different names. IM: So the Hebrew Institute was a center for social DM: Socials. We used to meet and we used to have dances and we used to have speakers and I always attended the speakers and I was the official piano player when they would all rise and sing Hatikvah. IM: Oh they sang it then too? DM: Hatikvah. We opened the meeting, we’d sing Hatkvah. IM: This was only when the Zionists group met. DM: Ya. IM: I see. Okay. So would you say that was the social life of the time for most young Jewish people? DM: That was the social life mostly. IM: Did you ever take part in anything else in the city? Was there anything like theater? Were there movies at that time? DM: Yes. There were movies. And there was, on Pratt Street, there was Unity Hall, where lecturers would come. I remember there was a Dr. Beardsley used to come. We used to go there and he used to talk on health. IM: This particular doctor came all the time or just once? DM: He used to come occasionally and talk on health to young people and that same place the young people used to meet with the sufragettes, Mrs. Hepburn, and her group would meet at the same hall and I would occasionally take in those meetings. IM: You would attend sufragette meetings? DM: I used to attend the meetings too. IM: Did you ever do anything actively or just attend meetings? DM: No, no. I didn’t take it too seriously. IM: You didn’t? Did the other people take it seriously? DM: I don’t know. The girls some, very few that did. We didn’t this that we would ever come to anything. IM: If I was a lot cause? Little did you know. How long did that go on for? Very long? Was it just a passing fancy with you or did you follow DM: It was passing until I got old enough to have other interest. IM: Okay, so this is what your early life was like. What was life like at home? Did you have telephones? DM: We had a telephone. We were the only ones in the neighborhood that had a telephone and we’d have some of the neighbors come in and ask if they could use the telephone to call a doctor of something. IM: When did you get it? Do you remember when you got the telephone? DM: We got the telephone in, let me see, Louie was 10 years old. Louise was born in, iy must have been in IM: Well it doesn’t matter. It was approximately when….. About 70 years ago? DM: Probably 1900. We had to have a telephone on account of the business. Of course we had a telephone in the business. IM: I see. So you used it primarily for the business? Now I know you were a very professional DM: There were very few telephones, or a doctor or the drug store, otherwise it, we couldn’t talk to friends, they couldn’t have any telephones. And we IM: Your friends didn’t have phones? DM: No. And we were one of the few that had electric lights. IM: Oh, you had electric lights? DM: Most everybody had gas lights. We had electric lights. IM: This was in the house on Pleasant Street? DM: On Pleasant Street. The second house? DM: That was the second house. And we also had central heating system. IM: So you were very progressive? DM: A central heating system and we had the radiators on the floor. IM: It blew up hot air? DM: Blew hot air and we were always warned to be careful. One of my brothers fell and sat on it and he had a hot time. IM: Okay. We know what you mean. Now you also were, I think, among the first to have a car, weren’t you? DM: We were one of the first in the neighborhood to have a car. First we had a, I forgot what you call, well anyway, it was for the family and IM: What kind? Do you remember what kind of car, the make? DM: It was an EMF, whatever that was, EMF car. IM: This was what year? Do you have any idea? DM: Oh that must have been 1912 probably. IM: Well I guess there weren’t many cars around then. DM: Oh, there were very few cars. IM: Who drove them? DM: Well Joe drove at first. IM: This was your oldest brother, Joe, drove it. DM: And then I think in 1915 or 14 we bought a Ford Runabout, and I drove that because I had to get up early Sunday morning with my father and drive him to New Britain to he his painters and to collect bills. IM: Oh, your father didn’t drive? DM: He did not drive and I used to do driving for him. And I used to drive around Hartford and do errands for him. IM: You were kind of a novelty, weren’t you? How many women drivers were there? DM: There were very, very few. I remember the time Molly, my sister-in-law Molly Sack Shapiro, she had a car. And at that time we didn’t have the self-starters. We had to crank the car. IM: You had to get out in front and crank it? DM: Ya. And you had to be very careful if you weren’t you could break your wrist. IM: You could what? DM: Break your wrist. IM: Oh, it was such hard work? DM: If I every stopped anyplace I always found a young man or kids would run over crank the car for me. IM: They were always happy to do it? They didn’t have an opportunity to crank many cars. DM: No. IM: Well that’s very interesting. Now, I know you had an interesting social life. Tell us what a girl like you would do to meet young men? DM: Well. IM: Besides going to the Hebrew Institute. DM: We had, I remember, that as I was, must have been probably 17, I thought it was time for me to bring al my friends in and to meet the younger groups of Hartford. I rented IM: You rented what? DM: I rented a hall. I had money so I did it. I remember I don’t think I paid very much. I rented a hall and hired three musicians and invited my girlfriends to come and to bring a fellow. I did invite some fellows. But I think most of the invitations says bring an escort and that’s when I brought Rose Kamins in and Molly Heller and a few other girls and so they met people. And I used to run little parties at home. We had a great big tent in our backyard and I used to run parties there. IM: And everybody knew if they came they’d get lots of good food? DM: Just have a good time. IM: And your mother was a good cook? DM: Oh yes, she’d provide the cakes and the cookies. IM: I think it might be interesting while we are talking about your family to bring to everyone’s attention the fact that when you were born what happened, tell us? Who came to assist at your birth? DM: Your grandpa’s mother was very, very close to our family because your great-grandfather Malley came from Sweden, he was close friend, very closed friend of your great-great grandfather, Falk. IM: Yes. DM: So naturally when my mother was about to be married, or rather your grandmother, grandpa’s mother, took charge of the affair IM: Daddy’s mother, are you talking about daddy’s mother DM: Yes. IM: Esther Malley. DM: Esther Malley took charge of my mother. She couldn’t talk English. IM: Oh, your mother could speak English? DM: No she had only been in this country a few months. IM: She came when she was 15? DM: She came when she was 16. IM: When she was 16 and she was married when she was 16. DM: No she was married on her 16th birthday. IM: On her 16th birthday so she had been here less than a year and she couldn’t speak English. She spoke Swedish. DM: Ya, she spoke just a little. Yiddish - and not too good Yiddish either because they spoke Swedish most of the time. IM: So grandma Malley DM: Grandma Malley went out with her and helped her get her trousseau and get her settled. After my mother was married she lived not too far from grandma Malley and when I was born, of course, she was there. IM: Why do you say of course she was there? Was she always there? DM: She used to visit all the time. They lived right close by. IM: And she came when she heard that your mother was about to deliver? DM: Ya, and when she saw me as a baby she said oh, there is a girl for my Schlamy. IM: And her Schlamy is Solomon Malley who is now your husband. So at your birth she said there is a girl for my Schlamy. Those were very prophetic words. That’s really amazing. DM: She was always very close with the family. She felt as though she was part of our family. IM: Now you know what we haven’t talked about at all is religion? DM: Religion. IM: Religion and how did you observe it, what time did you go to synagogue? DM: We went to a strictly Orthodox synagogue on Market Street the Adas Israel. IM: Are you talking about when you were a child? DM: A child growing up, yes. It was a beautiful large synagogue. IM: Was it already formed when you joined or did your father help DM: My father had joined it before it was built, then the congregation go so large that they built this beautiful large place on Market Street which now was moved into a church after IM: Well they tore down that synagogue and now the congregation meets DM: I used to go to services, holidays only, holiday services. I very rarely went. If there was a wedding which took place I was always there as a youngster. I was always there upstairs to watch the bride. IM: You love to watch weddings? DM: Oh, I love to watch the weddings IM: Were there very lavish weddings in those days? What was a wedding like in those days? DM: Oh yes. Very large weddings they in the center they had canopies in the center and oh yes they were dressed up and I think they would serve down the basement there they would serve the dinners. IM: Right in the basement of the synagogue? DM: We served very large dinners. Have large affairs and then we were Orthodox. IM: You kept a kosher house, your mother kept a kosher house? DM: We kept Glatt kosher meat and everything and I learned all about being kosher. IM: Ya. Okay. Now what about observances of holidays I mean you had DM: We always observed the holidays IM: Passover? DM: Passover, every holidays. The smallest holiday. IM: Oh, you observed every holiday. DM: Every holiday. My father didn’t go to business on holidays like Chanukah, even Chanukah now or whatever holidays in IM: Simchas Torah? DM: Simchas Torah, he didn’t go to business. He went to shul. And I went to business. IM: And you went to business? So the business stayed open? DM: The business stayed open and I went there. But it was always closed for Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur. IM: Of course. And when you had Passover did you have anyone besides the family? Did you every invite other people? DM: No we did not. We just had our own family. IM: Just your own immediate family. What else can you remember about Judaism, was it an important part of your life would you say? DM: It was important. We had a rabbi come to the house to teach the boys especially for their bar mitzvahs. IM: Did the rabbi come to the house from the time they were little? DM: When they were little they used to go to the rabbi’s home. The rabbi had what they called a Chada. He rented a room and he had chairs and they would all recite in unison. and I went too. IM: You went too? DM: I went too. IM: The boys went how many days a week? DM: The boys I think used to go every day after school. IM: Every day. Any then how many days a week did you go? DM: Well I went for a short time every day. Then when they were ready to get bar mitzvahed the rabbi came to the house and then I continued my studies so that I was able to read and write Jewish. IM: I see. That’s very interesting. Were Jewish people involved otherwise in the Jewish community? I mean did you become involved in any activities outside of your Jewish community, the Jewish Institute, the Jewish Hebrew Institute that you talked about? DM: No, I didn’t think so. We didn’t have any organizations for Jewish at all. IM: All of your friends were Jewish? DM: Yes, all of them are. IM: Well do you have anything else that you can remember about your childhood? How did you spend your summers? DM: All the summers we always went someplace for the summer. My father believed in us having a vacation. He would rent a little house out in the country and we spend the summer there and he would come out with his horse and buggy on weekends. IM: Now where was the country? DM: Out in Rocky Hill. IM: Rocky Hill. DM: He would bring bags full of bread and what knots of meats especially and we rented the house from an Irishman, I remember, and had a very small pond there. And the children go wading in the pond. At least it was nice and cool out there and then later years we rented a house at Ocean Beach. IM: Well by this time did you have cars? DM: By the time we went to Ocean Beach we had cars. We would rent a house at the beach for the summer and I would come out weekends too because if worked too. Then we, my father bought a house. In honor of your birth. IM: He build that house? DM: Had the house built when you were born in 1922. IM: That’s right. DM: He said we’ve got to have a house for our new granddaughter. IM: I was the first grandchild. DM: First grandchild IM: That was an important event, I know that. DM: That was an important event IM: Well I want to go back a little bit now to talk more about the earlier days. I would like to know something about how you and daddy met. Your families had known each other for many years before you were born and before he was born. You were always friendly. You grew up in the same city. You both were born in Hartford. Did not know each other from the time you were very little? DM: No I didn’t. I didn’t meet him. He started working at an early age and the only time I would see him if I went into Sage Allen and I would see him. IM: Oh when you went shopping? DM: Ya, when I went shopping. IM: You mean you just knew him casually then? DM: Casually, just casually. IM: Okay. So tell us how you happened to meet him then? DM: Well when Auntie Rebecca from New London would come in, you know she was very fond on grandma Malley, she would always, she knew the family so well and she said we will have to go to Sage Allen and see Sol. She liked him. So I would go with her and she would talk to him and I would talk to him casually. And then in 1918 we moved from Pleasant Street. We bought a home on Magnolia Street, a single home, large home. So after we moved in I decided to make a party. We had a big house there so I invited your grandpa and his sister. IM: You’re talking about daddy? DM: Ya, your daddy rather. Sol’s sister Sara I invited her and invited him to come. IM: I see so that’s how from then on you began to see him? DM: And from then on after that he called me and we went out. IM: What did you do on dates in Hartford in those days? DM: Well, he was away all week traveling, he was in the manufacturing business then. IM: Did you go to movies? DM: Did we go to the movies. Once in a while we’d go to the theater. IM: What theaters were there then? DM: Parsons Theater. IM: What kind of DM: The plays. Thy would come from New York, plays would come in. IM: Do you remember any of the plays? Was it Shakespeare? Was it contemporary? DM: Ya we saw a Shakespeare play and I remember we saw the Merchant of Venice. IM: Very famous people who came? DM: Oh yes. And then also on a Sunday a nice day I would take the car and I would drive and we would drive out in the country. IM: And take a ride? DM: We would take a ride. And we’d walk and we’d talk about discuss the problems of the day so forth. IM: Now tell us something about the rest of your family? What was life like in those days? Was it difficult growing up or was it easier than you think it is today? DM: We didn’t had a hard time. I think things went rather smoothly. We had this big home and we always had help, a maid in the house, we had plenty of room. This house on Pleasant Street that we took over from the two family house we had four bedrooms which was a lot for people to have because most of them THIS ENDED ABRUPTLY. I DON’T SEE WHERE IT CONTINUES ON ANOTHER TAPE.